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Breakups are tough, but ending a relationship with a narcissist brings a unique kind of emotional rollercoaster. If you’re saying to yourself, “My ex narc blocked me,” it likely left you confused, hurt, or even angry. Blocking someone is a common tactic used by narcissists, but the motivations behind it are often far more complex than simple anger or frustration.
In this article, we’ll explore why narcissistic exes block their former partners, what this move really means, and how you can emotionally navigate this situation without falling into their psychological traps.
Why Did My Narcissistic Ex Block Me?
When a narcissist blocks you, it’s not usually about moving on peacefully. It’s more about control, power, and maintaining their inflated sense of superiority.
1. They Want to Regain Power
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Narcissists often feel entitled to emotional control over their partners—even after the breakup.
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Blocking you can be their way of reclaiming dominance, especially if you initiated the breakup or started ignoring their manipulation tactics.
2. They’re Punishing You
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Blocking is sometimes a form of emotional punishment.
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If you called them out, set boundaries, or no longer serve their ego needs, they might block you to make you feel rejected and guilty.
3. They Need a Reaction
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Ironically, blocking you might be their way of fishing for attention.
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By cutting off contact, they hope you’ll panic, try to reconnect, or chase after them—feeding their need for narcissistic supply.
4. They Can’t Handle Emotional Discomfort
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Narcissists struggle to process vulnerability, shame, or rejection.
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Blocking you may be their way of avoiding uncomfortable emotions tied to the relationship ending.
5. They’ve Found a New Source of Supply
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Often, narcissists move quickly to new relationships.
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Once they have someone else to manipulate, they may block you to fully immerse themselves in this new dynamic.
The Narcissistic Playbook: Blocking as a Power Move
Blocking is rarely the final step in a narcissist’s manipulative cycle. It’s part of a larger pattern designed to keep you emotionally invested, even from afar.
1. Silent Treatment 2.0
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Think of blocking as a high-tech version of the silent treatment.
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By cutting you off on social media, texts, or calls, they create emotional distance and force you to wonder what went wrong.
2. Hoovering Set-Up
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Narcissists often “hoover,” or try to suck you back into the relationship after a period of silence.
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Blocking can be part of a hoovering cycle—they might unblock you later to re-establish contact when it suits them.
3. Image Control
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By blocking you, they may be curating an image where they look like the one who ended things “on their terms.”
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Narcissists are highly concerned with how they are perceived by others, including mutual friends.
4. Creating Scarcity
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Narcissists understand that scarcity can increase desire.
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Blocking you might be their way of making themselves seem more valuable or mysterious, hoping you'll crave their attention more.
How Blocking Affects You Emotionally
The emotional fallout from being blocked by a narcissist can trigger several feelings. Recognizing them is key to preventing further manipulation.
1. Shock and Confusion
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One minute, they’re seeking attention or engaging with you, and the next, they’re gone.
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This inconsistency can leave you reeling, questioning what you did wrong.
2. Anxiety and Insecurity
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Blocking may trigger self-doubt, making you wonder if you were too harsh, too cold, or not "good enough."
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Remember: this is a tactic to undermine your self-esteem.
3. Anger and Resentment
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Their sudden exit can provoke anger, especially if it feels like unfinished business.
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Narcissists thrive on keeping exes stuck in resentment, as it means you’re still emotionally tied to them.
4. Relief and Freedom
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Some people feel liberated once blocked.
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If you were dealing with emotional manipulation or gaslighting, the block might give you space to start healing.
Does Being Blocked Mean It’s Over for Good?
While you may assume that blocking marks the end, with a narcissist, nothing is ever that black-and-white.
1. Temporary Cut-Off
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Many narcissists unblock exes when they want attention, validation, or a return to toxic patterns.
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Blocking could be a pause in communication, not a permanent cut.
2. Testing Your Reaction
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Blocking can be a test to see if you’ll make extra efforts to contact them (e.g., creating new accounts or using friends to reach out).
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If you do, it reinforces their belief that they still control you emotionally.
3. Preparing for a Hoover
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After blocking you, they might wait weeks or months before resurfacing.
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The sudden reappearance (hoovering) is intended to destabilize you emotionally and make you more vulnerable.
What Should You Do Now That You’ve Been Blocked?
Rather than viewing this block as a rejection, consider it an opportunity for emotional freedom and healing.
1. Resist the Urge to Chase
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Avoid trying to contact them through other means.
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Chasing them may only empower them further and prolong your emotional dependency.
2. Reflect on the Relationship
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Use this time to examine the red flags and toxic dynamics you experienced.
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Journaling or therapy can help you process lingering emotions.
3. Take Control of Your Own Closure
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Narcissists rarely offer genuine closure.
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Accept that closure will have to come from within, through self-reflection and self-compassion.
4. Strengthen Your Boundaries
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Treat this block as a boundary that benefits your mental health.
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Use it as motivation to maintain distance emotionally, mentally, and physically.
5. Focus on Self-Care
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Prioritize activities that make you feel grounded and empowered, like exercise, meditation, hobbies, or reconnecting with loved ones.
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Healing requires actively rebuilding your confidence and self-worth.
6. Educate Yourself on Narcissistic Abuse
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Learning about narcissism can help you understand why they act this way.
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Knowledge will help you break free from self-blame and emotional entanglement.
Common Mistakes to Avoid
When narcissists block you, it’s easy to fall into psychological traps that can prolong your healing process.
1. Making It About Your Worth
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Their actions reflect their inner chaos, not your value.
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Don’t let their behavior dictate your self-esteem.
2. Creating Fake Profiles to Spy on Them
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This may provide temporary relief but keeps you emotionally tethered to their drama.
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Distance is key to detaching fully.
3. Venting Publicly
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Avoid airing grievances about them on social media.
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Narcissists love when their exes appear emotionally unstable or obsessed.
4. Assuming You’re the Only One
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Narcissists often repeat this pattern with multiple exes.
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You’re not alone, and this situation is not unique to you.
What If They Unblock You Later?
It’s not uncommon for narcissists to unblock and resurface later with confusing mixed signals.
1. Expect the Hoover
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If they unblock you suddenly, it could be a prelude to hoovering behavior.
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They may pretend to miss you or apologize, only to manipulate you again.
2. Stay Detached
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If they reappear, be cautious.
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Reflect on why you left and whether any positive changes have genuinely occurred (spoiler: they rarely do with narcissists).
3. Stick to Your Boundaries
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You are under no obligation to respond.
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If you do, keep interactions minimal, unemotional, and focused on practicalities (e.g., shared responsibilities).
In Conclusion
If you’re sitting with the realization, “My ex narc blocked me,” know that this is a common tactic used by narcissists to control, punish, and destabilize their ex-partners. While it might feel painful in the short term, it can ultimately be a blessing in disguise—a way to regain control of your emotional well-being.
Remember: narcissists block because they want power, not because you’re unworthy or flawed. Use this time to reclaim your peace, focus on self-growth, and build stronger emotional boundaries so you can finally break free from their toxic influence.